Questions with Qri: What Do I Do About This Connection When We’re Both Seeing Other People?

Q: Help! Every time we’re in the same city, we see each other. However, he has a fiance’ and a baby on the way. I also have a boyfriend, but I can’t stop seeing the other guy. What should I do?

A: It’s not a matter of you “can’t” stop, you “won’t” stop. You won’t stop this connection because you have yet to analyze the situation. Ask yourself why are you doing this, and what exactly are you doing? Is it because you both are working towards something together? Is it because y’all are just having “fun” and it’s not serious? Well if that were true, you would be able to stop seeing him because it’s not serious. However, you “can’t” stop seeing him because you’re caught up in the game he’s playing with you. Look at the reality, he has committed himself to someone else that’s carrying his child.

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Once you ask yourself these questions and realize the hurt that this will put on your significant others, you’ll let go of this unhealthy connection.

You’ll stop when you realize that this city boy doesn’t respect you and has ultimately made you disrespect yourself. You’ll stop when you’re tired of having to share him, and with his excuses when the baby comes. There will always be something. You’ll stop when your boyfriend never wants to speak or see you again because you lied to him time after time. It will kick in when you’ve begun to hurt the same way you hurt the other people involved.

Do what’s best for you. Stop wasting your boyfriend’s time, and release this other man. He belongs to the streets and right about now, so do you. Have some self-respect, and understand that you deserve to be happy with your own man. You have someone that trusts you and wants to be with you.

You are pretending that you can’t stop because right now it feels good and it’s exciting. However, if you can’t maintain self-control then karma will surely take control and show you what you knew all along. Good luck!

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